We had to put Dakota down this afternoon.
He was wincing and yelping in pain while lying down, could barely walk anymore, and when he tried to do stairs he just fell down them...to ease the pain we did however feed him many many dog treats, hot dog buns and of course, his dairy queen soft serve (his favorite). The other two dogs sat around him in the kitchen like I've never seen them do before. They knew. We knew.
I guess I have just been grieving already for the loss of many things and when it rains, maaaaan, it pours. So much change has been happening in my life in the past three months: the loss of Justin, my coworker, finishing my job, moving back to the U.S., moving again, leaving my Dad and his family, moving to Pacifica with my mom and her family, being unemployed, it is all just...a lot. On top of all these things, now I have had to put another animal down, and deal with more.
While I haven't been in physical pain this year, I have been dealing with more emotional things than I ever thought I would. More deaths have happened this year than I care to remember, more breakdowns and breakthroughs...I guess with the difficult times also come highs.
I am glad that I got to be here to say goodbye to one of the pieces of my childhood in person, to give that big slobbery and fur-shedding machine one big last smooch and hug. He was always a kind-hearted companion, one of the main reasons I love dogs, he didn't have a mean bone in his body. He loved everyone, which is something to aspire to. Yes, he was a klutz, yes, he stole more loaves of bread/birthday cakes/thanksgiving pies/5 lb bags of chocolate than I'd care to remember, but I will never think of Dakota (Coco, Dacoco as my father likes to say) as anything more than a big lug of love and fun.
You will be missed, Bubs, and already are.
Growing up sucks.
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